2012

While 2012 would be a great ride in an amusement park it is not a movie you want to spend two and a half hours watching in a theater. This movie borrows from past popular disaster movies to destroy all the world’s landmarks in a sort of CGI cornucopia. What it didn’t decide to steal were any of the storylines that made movies like “Armageddon” and “Independence Day” fun to watch.

Unlikely hero Jackson Curtis (John Cusack) takes you and his divorced family across the country some how outrunning every disaster with limos, RVs and even Russian charter planes. Their journey takes them as far as China where once again the US depends on Chinese manufacturing to save us. As the final countdown ticks and you wait for an experience that warranted the two hours you are greeted with nothing more than additional water and unimaginative hero sequences that do not offer any sort of closure.

The main characters performances are clichéd at best and seem to be forced in-between explosions to make a point about the importance of family and overall goodness of humanity. Heartfelt goodbyes are a redundant occurrence as families and friends are all taken over by the oncoming apocalypse. The one attempt at an underlying world-wide conspiracy story is half-heartedly dismissed as just doing what was best for the world. Adrian Helmsley (Chiwetel Ejiofor) our U.S. science adviser and co-hero laughably clears up all of the unnecessary deaths with one heartfelt speech which saves about a thousand people after millions have been taken over by various floods, volcanoes and earthquakes.

If you decide this is a movie you need to see spend the extra money for anything that will add to the experience. Find an IMAX theater, wear 3D glasses even if it is not offered and sit in newly added motion enhanced chairs. This will make your ticket about the price of an actual flight to China but it is the only way you can make 2012 an enjoyable experience and for me is a “Don’t see”.